“Die Trying” is a very apt title for Star Trek: Discovery Season 3, Episode 5, since the crew must prove themselves or, well… you know. In this episode, we also get a lesson on grief and ethnocentrism.

Welcome to another week where we recap, react to, and ruminate about the latest episode of Star Trek: Discovery. Mild spoilers ahead.

Catch up on previous articles here.

Recap: Challenge Accepted in Star Trek: Discovery Season 3, Episode 5: “Die Trying”

We finally get to see Starfleet and Federation headquarters, complete with futuristic ships that nod to series past. The crew of the Discovery are wide-eyed, enthusiastic, and hopeful as they prepare to be greeted. Not so fast. Starfleet is rather suspicious of the Discovery’s story as there are no records of the ship, her crew, the spore drive, or their mission ever existing.

After some diplomacy, it is agreed that the Discovery will go on a mission to find the USS Tikhov, a ship that contains all the seeds of every known plant to ever exist. This ship has the information needed to save a species from certain death. You know, just another day on the job. Meanwhile, Georgiou remains behind to be interrogated by a man who wears fake glasses because they make him look smart.

The Tikhov is crewed by a Barzan family. The knowledge that the Barzan people have joined the Federation gives Nhan a much-needed boost. That is short-lived, however, as a tragedy on the Tikhov occurs after a mass coronal ejection.

The mission is successful and Nhan teaches Burnham that there is not one healthy way to cope with death and grieve. Nhan decides to stay on the Tikhov where she has found family, the crew of the Discovery are reminded they are family, and Starfleet finally accepts the Discovery. But there is something very off about Georgiou.

Reactions: Episode 5 of Star Trek: Discovery Left People Screaming While Wrapped Up in a Nostalgia Blanket

Reactions online to “Die Trying” were overwhelmingly positive. Viewers got to see the newest USS Voyager. There was a ship named USS Nog, dedicated to Aron Eisenberg. Oded Fehr guest starred. And people screamed when they saw David Cronenberg appear as the doctor who wore fake glasses because they make him look smart. Amazing casting there as his character increased a general sense of unease in viewers.

This unease hit us during the opening when we experienced a whole lot of cognitive dissonance as hopeful happy music played, the crew was excited, and viewers feared the worse was about to happen. That fear turned to odd relief as the worst did not happen, but the hopefulness implied by the music didn’t happen either.

And that 2-ish minutes was a great way for viewers to experience a tiny bit of what some people with post-traumatic stress experience when they encounter an unknown.

Speaking of post-traumatic stress, there was a great little scene at the end where the admiral acknowledges that the crew is just beginning their journey in confronting and working through their trauma. Knowing that, he does not do the harmful thing that society does: he does not view the crew as damaged goods that can’t be trusted. Instead, he does the thing that needs to be done and puts trust in them and gives them the supports they will need.

Viewers also loved that Nhan was able to feel a sense of family again and find her peace.

Ruminations: Lessons on Grief and Ethnocentrism

I could again go on and on about how amazing the writers have been when it comes to trauma and working to create an accurate depiction of post-traumatic stress. But there is a thing the writers of “Die Trying” did that hit at the heart of Star Trek: They once again tackled ethnocentrism.

Deconstructing internalized ethnocentrism, and ethnocentrism in general, was a huge part of my university education. I got my first degree in psychology. There is a huge chunk of sociology in psychology, especially, as a lot of things that are views as “disordered” are actually based on cultural relativism and how behaviors interfere within a specific cultural setting. What is considered “disordered” in one culture can be revered in another.

And if we’re going to be honest, there has also been ethnocentrism within the Star Trek franchise. At times, it has been at odds with itself. Starting with The Original Series, we had Kirk warn viewers about judging ourselves superior to other cultures while also only using white Western European cultures as the gold standard. Who can forget “I don’t see color” as a pervasive thought throughout much of Star Trek’s history?

Deep Space Nine was unapologetically ethnocentric, creating a Federation that thought its culture was the only one that had value and was worth surviving, at any cost. While other series tried to give other cultures equality, even with glaring flaws, I couldn’t get behind the messaging in Deep Space Nine.

Regardless of how any one of us feels about any given series, for me, the heart of Star Trek is this critical lens that we need to see through in order to deconstruct our own biases and create understanding and empathy among people. For some people, Star Trek is about some utopian future. For me, its heart is human and focuses on personal growth that comes through self-examination – examination Picard loved to lecture about. Through this growth comes community and a want to support one another.

That is why I am so behind Nhan going toe-to-toe with Burnham about grief, loss and death, and what is considered a healthy way to do these things. It was sociology and psychology 101 stuff, and I was so there for it! Huge sections of courses deal with this exact topic. What is an appropriate way to display grief? My “at home” culture – the one in which I feel at home – is the one where people publicly wail when they experience the death of a loved one. There is no shame. It isn’t something to get over. Grief is on full display for everyone to share and take part in.

I grew up in a cultural environment much like the one illustrated by this Nhan/Burnham dichotomy. One side of my family was very British, with a stiff upper lip, among whom it was completely inappropriate to display emotion – especially emotions that they deemed to be negative. The other half of my family was Eastern European, where emotions go on full display. Where death is concerned, grief is loud and outward, and we live, in a way, with the dead for a while in order to help us move through our grief. It isn’t something to “get over.”

For me, the biggest take-away from this episode was a reminder to give people space for grief during a time of unimaginable loss. It also was a reminder to give myself grace and understanding as two very difficult cultures fight for dominance within me about what is an appropriate way to outwardly express my current grief. Let us be kind to one another as we display our grief in many appropriate ways.

Until next week, Live Long and Prosper.